In search of a goal

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September 29, 2011

Emotions

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Thursday, September 29, 2011 at 9:02 PM filed under Weight Loss postings
Clearly I need a more productive way to deal with my emotions. For the past 9 years I've used food as a bandaid for my pain. It never used to be that way, and I'm not really sure how it all started, though I have a guess.

9 years ago, at 22 years old, my life was turned upside down. I was young. Naive, married, a mom to a 13 month old baby, living 12 hours away from my entire family without a single friend in the world besides my son...and, so I thought, my husband. I&n...
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Last comment by chocolatechips on 9/30/2011 9:42 AM
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September 7, 2011

A letter to my body

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Wednesday, September 7, 2011 at 6:21 AM filed under General postings
Dear Body,
I feel terrible. I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, and I've realized that I have been a horrible friend. I can understand why you are so angry with me. I haven't been fair to you, and I've been completely selfish. For this I'm sorry.

We've been friends for a long time. More than thirty years. We've really had so many great memories, it doesn't seem right for us to fight like this. I have so much in my life to thank you for....but ...

August 30, 2011

Strength in Numbers

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Tuesday, August 30, 2011 at 9:48 PM filed under Weight Loss postings
It's been 10 days since I've posted. In that time I've probably consumed 10 times more calories than I should have. I feel guilty, I feel gross, and as I'm typing I'm looking down at the tire that encircles my "waist" and wish that I could just cut it off. I'm too hard on myself.

I honestly cannot say what has gotten in my way the past few days. I stepped on the scale a few days ago and it hadn't gone anywhere. It pissed me off. But, instead of being motiv...

August 19, 2011

2 steps forward, 2 steps back

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Friday, August 19, 2011 at 6:24 AM filed under Weight Loss postings
What has started out as a great week has quickly taken a turn. Monday and Tuesday I was like a shining example of how one should eat. Stopping when full, choosing light snacks and drinking tons of water.  Naturally I was pretty proud of myself to see, on Wednesday that I had dropped 1 1/2 pounds since my journey began a week ago. Not too bad. I was honestly expecting to be disappointed and was pleasantly surprised....now 48 hours after that weigh-in I'm realing with guilt.
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Last comment by BLUEFOX on 8/22/2011 8:47 PM
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August 15, 2011

A step or two in the right direction

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Monday, August 15, 2011 at 6:27 AM filed under Weight Loss postings
It's been a while since I've been satisfied with choices that I made...but after this weekend I feel OK. I took steps in the right direction. I've begun to look at this whole diet thing as an overall lifestyle change. Good choices and small tweaks here and there will hopefully get me to my end goal. My two biggest tweaks this weekend were:
1.) I've nixed Soda. I love soda. Soda runs through my blood. It's an addiction that dates back to childhood when my mother would pour u...
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Last comment by vasti on 8/16/2011 2:55 AM
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August 11, 2011

invalid justification

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Thursday, August 11, 2011 at 9:56 PM filed under Weight Loss postings
I can justify almost anything to myself. Today, I proved it as, on day ONE of my newly formed "motivated to look hot at a wedding full of people I don't know" diet I caved and ate an ice cream cone. I then proceeded to tell myself it was ok. The is the battle I've been waging internally for years now often goes somethign like this
 --"NO N you should NOT eat that ice cream, it will go straight to your hips."
--"Yes, but I just ran 20 feet to...
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Last comment by vasti on 8/12/2011 11:40 AM
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August 11, 2011

And so it begins

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Thursday, August 11, 2011 at 6:56 AM filed under Weight Loss postings


 

 I'm fat. I know this about myself, and I'm sick of it. I'm sick and tired of how the way my pants fit can determine my mood for an entire day. I'm sick of how the button of my too-tight pants leaves a mark in my fleshy stomach.  I'm sick of comparing myself to celebrities and the skinny coworker who spit out two kids and is still a size 2. I'm sick of how string bikinis get lost in the flesh of my hips. I'm sick of being jealous of my friends everytime they l

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Last comment by nlf218 on 8/11/2011 7:52 PM
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