Marcie From Montreal

So with my resolution clear, and my desired outcome in mind, I can say with confidence that I haven't done a damn thing to make myself any smaller. But never fear, it wasn't without reason. My life has been hectic, and I'm a bit confused about a whole bunch of stuff right now. And I warn you, here on out it may get a bit tedious to read about my life, but it's therapeutic for me, and it's something I feel that I need to do for myself.

See, my love life is a tad... screwy right now. The problem happens to be that I'm dating someone I like, and he's the first guy I can say I've ever really gone out with past a second date. All the other either bored me to tears or lost interest in me. This guy is different, and I think if we keep it up, maybe he'll become my boyfriend. This is something that, to any normal person with a head on their shoulders would celebrate over. But not me.

I can't celebrate because I happen to be in love with my best friend. And maybe love's a strong word for someone my age, but I'm going to use it a bit liberally in this blog because I've never felt about anyone this way before, and I don't have the faintest idea what love's supposed to feel like.

He's someone I can count on to always be there. He knows me better than I do sometimes, and he makes me smile in a way no one can. But he doesn't like me. Not that he's ever told me that I happen to be stuck in the friend zone, but if anyone has ever seen the movie "Just Friends" with Ryan Reynolds, I can clearly see a parallel between the two of us (weight and all).

True, they fall in love in the end, and live happily ever after, but I don't think I want to wait quite so long for him to notice me as more than a friend. I want him to see ME, which is part of the reason I've made this resolution for myself.

Anyways, I'm sure I'll sort all of this out in due time. Besides, whatever's meant to happen will happen. 

On a side note, I hope everyone's New Year is off to a smashing start.