Let's do this!!

44 F

A little about me :)

Wednesday, April 7, 2010 at 9:01 AM filed under Diet & Nutrition postings
I guess all I have to say is that it is time. I am thirty years old and have struggled with my weight since I can remember. I think most of my problem stems from the fact that I have never owned it. I was the way I was because of other people. You know when I was younger I had people telling me I was overweight at the age of 6 and they put me on diets. All of my life I have blamed them because they "messed up my metabolism" at a young age. That is over. They haven't been shoving food in my mouth for the past 20 years. That is done and it now is mine. My weight has been on my mind constantly for the last few years. I've had three small children and I have taken care of myself very well when I have been pregnant to the point I lose 50 to 60 lbs every pregnancy. Once I am done I am back to my old self and I gain it all back. I always use the excuse that I am a healthy fat person. You know I have low blood pressure and cholesterol, but am I able to do any physical activity. No way. I exercised last night for the first time in many many months. It kicked my butt!! It's a 30 min workout and at minute 14:23 I felt my limbs go numb and heavy. I wanted to quit. I pushed through it and I was amazed at how out of shape I am. I wasn't able to do what they could. It's very sad. Out of the mouth of babes comes the hard truth. My four year old said that I couldn't do it because my belly was too big. Ouch! Truth hurts ;) I am doing this for me, but also for them. I want to be here for them for a long time. I want to be able to run with them and chase after them and play with them. I want to be around for their graduations and weddings and all the important events in their lives. My dad died at a very young age. It is so hard to go to weddings and all other family events and not have him there. It breaks my heart. That will not be me. To close I have to thank my sister, Cassandra, she said something to me that woke me up a little. She said she loves me the way I am, but she doesn't want to have to live missing me. She doesn't want to have to miss talking to me or cry because I am no longer around. Life is short and we have to live it to the fullest. How can I if I am huffing and puffing though it? It's scary for me and I know it will be a long, hard journey, but I'm going to take it one day at a time.
1 Comment (add)
Last comment by mizbehaven on 4/7/2010 10:14 AM

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