the start of my work out

My body hurts it feels like every muscles is being torn apart everytime i walk or move. Its only my second day and it feel like i have been working out for a full 24 hrs and some. i know that the pain is showing that i am doing something and i feel great when i do feel it. I think that it proves to myself that i am making the right steps and showing all that i am capable of doing it... i know i am not completly overweight but i feel ashamed of how my body looks. I hate trying on clothes in a store i hate shopping for me period. becouse i am so self concious about the way i look and i have always been like that. Even when i was in school and played competive sports such as basketball, i ran track and i also worked out with the wrestling team and football team. i never thought that my body was the best that it could be. i felt like i should look different then what i do know....I have tryed diet after diet and i never seem to stick to it. And so i am hopping that with a lil more harder of a push on my part i can look and feel the way that i have always wanted myself to be.I know that i should be proud of the way i look know and just to be able to work out and look down and say to myself you know Tori you are beutifull no matter what my body looks like,but i cant i look down and say stuff like look its tina the talking belly or i have a big pancake on my stomach. I say horrible things about myself and i dont like that i do it and nor does my husband, but what am i supposed to do when i am un happy with the way i look and feel. Its pretty bad when my husband can look at me and say you are the beutifull thing that walks these earth, and i tell him to shut up becouse im not beutifull i see no beuty in me at all. no were on me. i know i need to get over the fear of it but its hard so i am excited to see results and see how the image of myself changes


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