Yeah the title pretty much says it all but you might not understand it the way it sounds. I have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and my number one fear is food.....so this is when you ask "so how the hell did you get fat?" Im glad you asked!!! In my mind certain foods terrify me or how the way certain foods are prepared scare me....like I can eat a truck load of chicken nuggets but I cant go to a restaurant and order a grilled chicken sandwich because I think in my head "what if the cook didnt prepare that right and I get food poisoning and throw up?" And then this is where another should pop up
"Why is she worried about throwing up?"
From 5th grade to 8th grade I had bulimia and anorexia nervosa. I was 155 .lbs and dropped down to 90.lbs before I was forced into getting help.
And after that I guess I just didnt believe I was pretty bigger, even though I was praised for getting back to a healthy weight but then somehow I developed a fear of getting sick so I would eat but all the wrong things because I believed home cooked food was bad. weird yes? I know....Over the years I have been able to conquer most of that but there is still alot I fear so dieting is hard for me but I will conquer this and get to a weight I finally can feel completely beautiful....Plus I hope to make a few new friends.