Starting over...day 1
Tuesday, March 29, 2011 at 11:14 PM filed under General postings
I started on this journey 5 yrs. ago to change my life and get healthy. It took me 14 months to lose a total of 150 lbs. I was 300 lbs in the beginning, and definately unhealthy and felt tired and just out of shape. I guess I didnt really realize just how unhealthy until it was staring me right in the face. Attempting to take a bike ride with my family that left me gasping for air and my muscles burning after only 2 blocks. I could not go any farther physically and that did it! I went right home...locked myself in the bathroom and cried. I was ashamed, angry at myself and disappointed. I felt so terrible that I had let my son down and myself. What had I done? How could I not see how I let myself go? Why was I fooling myself? I needed a change and that next day I got on my treadmill and went a whole 5 minutes. Up until that time, the treadmill was always a "I'll do it tomorrow" sort of attitude. But, I was determined to do it and I managed to count down those 5 minutes.
I continued to stay with my healthy lifestyle and gained confidence, strength, and a new attitude towards fitness. Like I said, I lost 150 lbs and I was a whole new me...only half the size. I went from a size 24 to an 8. I learned to love fresh fruit and veggies.
Then in 2007, my husband passed away unexpectedly and my world crashed. Nothing made sense anymore and I felt so alone. Depression became my constant....and I began to fall into those old, familiar bad habits.
I have pulled myself up from the ashes....it was a long, hard road. I know that I have to rekindle that passion and get myself back on track. Health is so important...and I must do it for myself first and my son also.
So, here I am again...starting weight of 192 and I wont allow myself to go any higher. Today, I got on my eliptical and went 20 minutes. Not so bad, I thought. Fitness level is no where near I want it to be, but I will get there. I deserve to get there!!
My husband was so very proud of me. He used to say, " I have a new wife" and that always kept me on track. I could almost see him smile as I was working out today.
I will get into those size 8's again....I will!!!