BEFORE DAY ONE.
I would like to start off by stating that I am NOT 18 years old, that is just how old you must be to be on this website...but sadly, I am sixteen and scarcely overweight. my doctor told me about two years ago that if I didnt get it under control then, I wouldn't ever. but of course, being fourteen at the time, I didn't listen. I hate the way I look, and feel. I am only sixteen. I shouldn't hate myself, or how I look. High school just naturally makes you feel insecure. When you walk down the hallway, and you hear people snicker and make rude comments. But they have no idea what I have been through. I am an emotional eater. I became one when I was only eleven years old. My father died in a garage fire right in front of me. All I could do was stand there, useless. From that day on, I ate when I was mad, sad, depressed, happy, so pretty much ALL OF THE TIME. Before my dad passed, I was big on sports. I played softball, and was a cheerleader. But after he died, I just stopped. I felt like I didn't have a reason to play anymore. Now, I am sixteen and two-hundred and five pounds. I weigh more than I ever have, and I feel disgusting. It is gross. I have no self-confidence. I am really smart, funny, kind, gentle, and loving. But the way you look goes a long way. I learned that a long time ago. People accept you when you look good. And in high school, all you want is to be accepted. Don't get me wrong, I have the best friends anyone could ask for, great grades, a wonderful family, and a loving mother who catches me, and picks me up when I fall. But I want more. No. I need more. I HAVE to change myself now, or I know that I never will.
TOMORROW -->
I am excited, happy, and nervous all at the same time. I am nervous to change. I am happy that I am finally making the decision to change myself for the better. I am happy that I am no longer going to procrastinate, and I am excited about the new me. I am going to have to work my ass off, literally. But I cannot wait.
Tomorrow. <3
7/26/12.
Starting Weight: 205
Goal Weight: 165-170
Wish me luck, Lord knows I am going to need it. <3
